


Forever after all

by Storithiana



Category: TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works, The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-03
Updated: 2015-07-10
Packaged: 2018-04-02 17:01:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4067701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Storithiana/pseuds/Storithiana
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thranduil wants Celeborn all to himself – but he has to share his lover’s heart with not only one, but two others. Can he settle down when he gets just a fraction of what he wants?</p>
<p>Excerpts from the lives of the two sindar – a story of a love they both needed but was never really meant to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story was mostly inspired by Fall Out Boy's Infinity on High and All Time Low's Future Hearts so the lyrics in the beginning of the chapters are mainly from these two albums.
> 
> I'm sort of nervous about posting it but here it goes... Hope you like it.

1.

_I'm a stitch away from making it  
And a scar away from falling apart_

_~_

_For the thrill of your touch I will shamefully lust  
As you tell me we're nothing but trouble_

~

Thranduil Oropherion let out a deep sigh as he curled up deeper into Celeborn’s arms. They both seemed tranquil and happy but the young sindar elf couldn’t help having grim thoughts in his mind. He didn’t like hiding in dim chambers, he would’ve rather spend the day outside. But of course it wasn’t an option if he wanted to spend some time with Celeborn.

He was glad that the older elf had answered his feelings and invited him to his life but there was one problem. He was willing to give his heart wholly to his lover but he could never get Celeborn all to himself. Galadriel of course was his beloved wife but Thranduil had a feeling there was something or someone else occupying a place in Celeborn’s heart as well.

“I know what you are thinking”, Celeborn murmured in Thranduil’s ear and placed a kiss on his forehead.

“Do you?” Thranduil asked as he knew Celeborn perhaps only guessed a fraction of the thoughts circling in his head.

“You are sulking because we both know I soon have to leave”, Celeborn stated and Thranduil shrugged.

“Not as much as usually”, Thranduil said with a crooked smile on his lips. He felt no need to tell Celeborn that he really had no idea of his lover’s greater worries. Celeborn smiled back at Thranduil and kissed him tenderly. The kiss was as most of their kisses were – affectionate, gentle and almost drowsy. As if they were in no hurry although they nearly always were.

“One might think it means you have started to get fed up with me”, Celeborn said after their kiss and his voice sounded amused but Thranduil wasn’t sure whether Celeborn was actually joking or not, “as you don’t object me having to go elsewhere, as hard as you used to…”

“Please, don’t speak”, Thranduil pleaded as he was afraid there could be too much truth in Celeborn’s words, “just touch me, my love, while you are still here.” With a chuckle Celeborn obeyed and made a low moan escape from Thranduil’s lips.

~

In spite of the difficulty and secretiveness of their relationship, while in Doriath, Thranduil and Celeborn managed to see each other relatively often. Thranduil was glad about it and there were moments when he felt like he could cope with all the things that were bothering him. There were moments when having Celeborn devote to him in the darkness was just enough.

“I have missed your skin”, Celeborn breathed against Thranduil’s bare chest. Thranduil was lying on silken sheets and Celeborn was placing kisses all over his body. “You are so irresistible…”

“That is why we got into this situation in the first place”, Thranduil said, chuckling, “because we cannot stay away from each other.” He placed his hands gently on Celeborn’s cheeks and pulled in him for a demanding kiss. For Thranduil, the kiss was slightly overwhelming – since elves felt everything so deeply and there were so many hidden messages in the kiss.

“I think you may have been a bit bored, as well”, Celeborn muttered and bit Thranduil’s left nipple gently. Thranduil was about to say something but Celeborn proceeded to squeeze his leggings-covered crotch and a low moan came from his lips.

With a chuckle Thranduil took a strong grip of Celeborn’s hair and pulled him into a demanding kiss. Thranduil preferred to be rough and Celeborn gladly obliged to it. It wouldn’t have suited them to make sweet, tender love to each other instead of their rough and frantic meetings in the darkness.

After the kiss, Celeborn hastily opened the laces of Thranduil’s leggings and with a little help from him Celeborn slid them off and threw them to the floor. Soon they were both out of their clothes and Celeborn grinned as he placed himself between Thranduil’s legs.

“I have been waiting this _so much_ the whole day”, Thranduil sighed, “ _oh, valar_!” was all that came from Thranduil’s mouth when Celeborn lowered his head and took his lover fully into his mouth, and began the slow vertical movements of his head.

It were moments like that when Thranduil forgot all about his worries, even for a few minutes, and felt like maybe it was just enough for the both of them. It was a shame those moments never lasted longer.


	2. Chapter 2

2.

_And I've traced your shadows on the wall_  
_Now I kiss them whenever I'm down,_  
_Whenever I'm down_

~

Above everything else, Celeborn felt grateful for Thranduil. He knew what he wanted from the younger sinda wasn’t fair – of course no one wanted to be the secret lover, the one who couldn’t bear daylight. 

Their relationship wasn’t the most usual one and had to be kept an absolute secret but somehow they had managed to make it work, at least in Celeborn’s opinion. At first it all may have been merely physical attraction but it soon evolved something very different.

Celeborn needed Thranduil – not like he needed Galadriel, the love of his life, to simply exist, but to make him see the good in life and feel vibrant and joyful. Thranduil wasn’t naïve but still, he was younger and felt everything so deeply and at that time he managed to find beauty in everything. For Celeborn, Thranduil was a perfect mixture of young vividness and elven wisdom.

What Celeborn had never said aloud was that in a way Thranduil reminded him of someone, someone who unlike Thranduil had always been beyond his reach.

It was Elu Thingol, the King of Doriath. But Thingol Greycloak was way too high above Celeborn and the only creature that had ever caught his eye was Melian. So, his infatuation of Thingol only ever consisted of admiring from the distance. Thranduil, on the other hand, had let him so close that sometimes it felt even a bit overwhelming.

Celeborn didn’t think his affection towards Thranduil was caused by the resemblance of Thingol but he still decided it was better not to say anything about it to his lover. Thranduil was ready to share Celeborn’s heart and mind with Galadriel but surely not with any other.

~

Perhaps even more than receiving pleasure himself, Celeborn loved to please Thranduil and nothing made him more satisfied and happy than Thranduil’s low moans and the look on his face when Celeborn satisfied his needs.

“You are far too good at this”, Thranduil muttered, contented and slightly out of breath, “you know exactly what to do to me with that tongue of yours…”

“I am glad you think so”, Celeborn nearly purred in Thranduil’s ear as he wrapped his arms around his naked lover. Thranduil looked at Celeborn with a strange look. It was a seemingly happy smile but beneath there was something Celeborn couldn’t get a grasp of. However, he decided to forget about it for now and think about it later, perhaps when he was alone.

Thranduil tried to keep an intense eye contact with Celeborn but his eyes soon fluttered and closed gracefully. Celeborn smiled and sighed, “You are such a precious and beautiful creature…”

~

One of the things Celeborn fancied about Thranduil the most was his voice.

It was so beautiful and melodious – and there was a slightly different, charming tone for every occasion.

There was the low and secret voice that no one other than Celeborn had heard. The sinful voice. It drove Celeborn crazy with lust every time, as Thranduil usually said all the dirtiest things using that tone. Thranduil knew it and loved to tease Celeborn with it.

Then there was Thranduil’s happy voice, which was almost always laced with laughter and smiles. When Thranduil used his happy tone, there was no way Celeborn could have been sad himself. Hearing Thranduil so joyous made him that as well.

The third one was the voice Thranduil used in public. It was calm, melodious, formal and sometimes even a little cold and distant. It resembled the most the voice of Thranduil’s father, Oropher.

The last one Celeborn didn’t hear often but it was the voice that made his heart break into small pieces every time Thranduil spoke with that tone. It was the sad and discouraged voice Thranduil used when he was heartbroken and seemed like he didn’t see anything good in the whole world.


	3. Chapter 3

3.

_The best way to make it through  
With hearts and wrists intact  
Is to realize two out of three ain't bad_

_~_

_I am left standing on the edge  
Wondering why we fall so hard, why we fall so hard_

~

At the same time, Thranduil’s melancholy and dissatisfaction but also his affection for Celeborn grew. He became unsure of what he should do. More than ever he felt like the secrecy and hiding were not nearly enough but he knew he could never ask Celeborn to leave Galadriel for him. Even if he did, it would never happen, Thranduil was reasonable enough to know that.

But Thranduil thought that maybe, just maybe, he could find some sort of consolation or understanding if he found out who was the third one Celeborn had feelings for. Although Thranduil knew digging up his lover’s secret could only make things even more difficult than they already were, he grew more and more certain that _he needed to know_.

He didn’t even fully understand why, he just knew the restlessness and unhealthy curiosity wouldn’t go away before he knew the secret.

As it happened every once in a while, Thranduil and Oropher were invited to a dinner hosted by Thingol and Melian in their court and Thranduil knew Celeborn was going to be there as well, with his wife. It was almost twisted that more than being happy to see his lover’s face again he was pleased that he had a perfect chance to watch Celeborn and perhaps find some clues.

And suddenly, as Thranduil observed Celeborn and his expressions across the table, a realisation hit him. Then he knew that it was a mistake to begin to suspect anything – the realisation hurt him too deeply.

He did the best he could to hide his true feelings, as he studied Celeborn’s expressions and came even more certain that what he had just seen was true. The answer had been right in front of him all the time.

It was the king himself that Celeborn was longing for. 

~

Thranduil had no idea what to do. He was hurt, he could’ve never imagined that Celeborn could do something that made him feel like that.

But then again, Celeborn hadn’t done it voluntarily. At least the part where he had fallen for the king of Doriath he hadn’t.

It was hard to explain the reason why Thranduil felt even more betrayed after finding out the identity of Celeborn’s secret infatuation. Was it just because it was easier to target his sorrow and disappointment at a certain person than just a nonspecific someone? Or was it something else?

At first he wasn’t even sure whether he should open up to Celeborn about his discovery or not. At first he really wanted to try to live with it just like he was living with all the other problems but this was something bigger. Something he didn’t sign up for when he had ended up with Celeborn.

Thranduil also had to remind himself that he shouldn’t trust his suspicions too much before he got a clarification from Celeborn himself. Thranduil almost wished that maybe Celeborn would deny the accusations and he was merely being too jealous. But only almost. He didn’t even believe that to be a possibility. He was too sure, he knew Celeborn too well to have false guesses.

When Thranduil came up with the desperate idea that maybe he was just a consolation prize Celeborn had decided to settle down for when he couldn’t get what he truly wanted, he knew he _had to_ talk to his lover.

~

“Celeborn”, Thranduil said and confused Celeborn with his overly-serious tone which he very rarely used when there were just the two of them, “Do you think of me just as a replacement for the king?” 

“What?” Celeborn blurted out, raising his dark eyebrows. Thranduil didn’t know whether Celeborn’s startled expression was skilfully faked or genuine – Celeborn probably had never expected to hear those words coming from his lover’s lips but then again he knew exactly what Thranduil was talking about.

“Did you fall for me merely because I was someone who could perhaps replace Elu Thingol in your heart?” Thranduil rephrased his question.

“How… how did you find out?” Celeborn asked slowly, not yet answering Thranduil’s question. The young sinda felt almost frustrated but controlled his emotions the best he could. That was not a time for his usual expressiveness and vibrancy.

“A while ago, I began suspecting something of this sort was going on inside your head… When I knew what I was looking for, it was easy. It’s the way you look at him, Celeborn. I know that admiring look so well, you know.”

“Thranduil…” Celeborn sighed as desperation grew inside him, “I am aware there is no way I can convince you but… I love you for being you. I did not want to tell you merely because I knew finding out would make you feel odd. I wish you could forgive and understand.”

“I… I need time to think about this”, Thranduil replied, “then, maybe I will.” It hurt him to act so cold to Celeborn but he realised it was better to calm down rather than making decisions without thinking thoroughly first.


End file.
